Clarifying

OK, so some people pointed out to me that my last post sounded a bit sad. Dad said for people who didn't know me well they'd think I was depressed. A friend sent me a long pick-me up message with advice and ideas (which was greatly appreciated BTW :), Dennis read it and told me I just sounded sad. It's odd he read it though, he rarely reads this blog, even though it's e-mailed to him, unless I tell him to read it. But anyway, it wasn't supposed to sound sad, just frustrated. Life with 3 small kids can be hard! And I'll admit there are days I consider going out and getting job just to get to run away :) My friend Andrea commented on someone's post on facebook and said that "Trying to clean with awake children is like trying to brush your teeth while eating an Oreo!" That's the sentiment where the last post came from, lol.

But my kids will only stay little for a short time. Look at Charity, she's almost 5 already! And normally I focus on the good things in life, because there are so many. But sometimes when I've had a rough day (or night as the case may be, I was tired that morning) then I focus on the negatives around.

I really am blessed, however, to be able to stay home with the kids. Blessed to have such a wonderful loving husband who is able to work and support his family. And not only is he there for us financially but emotionally as well. He loves to spend time with his children playing with them, teaching them and he loves to spend time with me. Of course you already know I love to spend time with him as well! Life is good and I wouldn't trade it away for anything.

Formerly Sarah Dennis and Kiddos, Now Daddy's Girls!

So for those of you receiving my blog posts by e-mail. Sorry I changed the name! I didn't realize what the e-mails looked like until my Dad pointed out today that he wouldn't have known they were from me except that I mentioned Rebecca's name.

So, instead of receiving e-mails with the subject Sarah, Dennis and Kiddos. It is now Daddy's Girls! I hope you're all enjoying keeping caught up with our lives! :)

General Dissatisfaction

As I was lying awake at 5 in the morning thinking about life and not being able to get back to sleep after Danielle was up in the middle of the night AGAIN. I realized I have a general dissatisfaction with life lately and I don't know what to do about it.

I don't keep the house as clean as I'd like... and I can't seem to find a system yet that works.

I don't go to the gym as often as I should, yet some days I go more than I want to.

It feels like I have to choose to either clean my house or go to the gym, I can't do both but both are so important.

I don't spend enough time with the kids, playing with them, teaching them; yet I don't get enough time for me.

I get frustrated and angry with the kids way too much, yet they don't seem to care or respond until someone gets upset with them. Daddy doesn't like to get upset with them so I have to be the bad guy.

I definitely don't get enough time with Dennis, even though we recently started swapping babysitting with some friends so we get to go out every other week.

Life has just become so complicated and hectic. It seems like we don't get enough time to talk about the big things, let alone the little ones. So trying to make decisions about things has become a huge hassle.

I started making the girls skirts, they're still not done, ok I got 1 for each of them done, but I'm not done with the ones I originally started (silly me picked out a complicated patten that requires a lot of work). I wanted to have some dresses made for them for our trip, out of some really cute pink material and that is so not going to happen unless I ignore everything else over the next week but I can't ignore everything because I've got to find time to pack on top of everything else that needs done.

I want to read more, but can't find the time really to get to sit and enjoy a book without feeling guilty over what else I'm not doing. It's been several weeks since my last one.

I feel like I watch way too much tv, or spend way too much time on the computer; yet most of that time is spent while I'm holding Rebecca or feeding her or something. Which then factors into me feeling like I don't spend enough time with them because I should be giving all my attention to her or the other kids, right?

I don't know, I just haven't been able to seem to get back in the swing of things yet. That's what I was talking about in my other post that maybe I've just taken on too much too soon. After Charity was born I didn't manage to cook dinner until she was 4 months old, sure Rebecca is 5 months now but I'm still only cooking occasionally when I can get around to it. Maybe it's a time management issue or simply not enough time issue, I don't know, but most days it seems that I'm barely keeping my head above water and I know I've let some important things slide lately that I shouldn't have due to either completely forgetting or lack of caring.

I used to keep track of things and get things taken care of so much better than I have over the past year. Some days I feel like this last pregnancy stole all of my brain cells but forgot to give them back when it was over. Can you get permanent brain damage from pregnancy? lol? My memory is shot, I forget so many things lately, it's frustrating.

Anyway, so there's my dissatisfaction with life right now. I don't know how so many things can fall on both ends of an issue! Maybe I'm just searching for some better balance, I hope I find it soon!

Craziness

So I have just felt completely overwhelmed with everything lately. I was saying something about it today with a friend and she asked what all I was doing. I have no idea! I found this a while back and figured maybe it explains it better :)

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(Author Unknown)

Recently, I was diagnosed with C.A.A.D.D. - Child Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests: I decide to do the laundry. As I start toward the basement, I notice that there are cheerios all over the floor and my house keys are in the cereal bowl. I decide to pick up the cheerios before I do the laundry. I lay my keys down on the counter, put the cheerios in the trashcan under the counter, and notice that the trashcan is full. So, I decide to take out the trash. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash I may as well pay the bills first. I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left, my extra checks are in my desk in the office, so I go to my desk where I find a sippy cup full of juice. I'm going to look for my checks, but first I decide I should put the sippy cup in the refrigerator to keep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the sippy cup a plant on the counter catches my eye--it needs to be watered. I set the sippy cup on the counter, and I discover baby wipes that I've been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back in the bathroom, but first I'm going to water the plants. I set the wipes back down, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote, left on the kitchen table. I realize that when I go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the plants. I splash some water on the plant, but most of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back down, get some paper towels and wipe up the spill. Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do. At the end of the day: the laundry isn't washed, the bills aren't paid, there is a warm cup of juice sitting on the counter, the plants aren't watered, there is still only one check in my check book, I can't find the remote, I can't find the wipes, and I don't remember what I did with my keys.

Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today. I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.

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On a serious note. I really don't know, maybe it's having a newborn in the house, maybe it's having 3 young children in the house, or 2 younger kids plus a newborn, poor time management, too much laziness, or what, but I really do feel so much of the time that I'm not able to accomplish even half of the things that I should be getting done! Even the days I try really hard to get a lot of things done it just doesn't seem to work out.

Afternoons are hard because Rebecca just wants to be held and entertained, evenings are hard because there is just so much to do. So, if I don't get the things done in the morning that need done, then nothing seems to get done around here. Who knows, maybe in a few more months I'll have things better figured out...

Rebecca's 4-Month appointment

Rebecca had her 4-month appointment last Friday. She's of course growing like a weed. :)

So, she came in at 26 1/4" and weighed 12lbs 6oz. So, that puts her above the 95% for length and about the 30% for weight. We grow 'em long and skinny apparently. :) She's getting so big though! And it turns out that she's doing a lot of things they look for in 6-month olds. Lol, of course I already knew my babies grow up way too fast!

But my favorite part was when the Doctor asked if she was a good baby because she just has this angelic look about her. Yup, that's what he said, angelic look. I hope that's what we have in store for us :) But she's not acting so angelic at the moment since she's tired so I'd better go put her to sleep...

Day 24 - Something That Makes You Cry

Let's see... something that makes me cry... Just about anything now a days, lol. I used to never cry but after becoming a Mom, those hormones mess with you and everything makes me cry... Ok, not really everything. But I'd say the #1 thing that makes me cry is the death of a spouse or child in a movie. That gets me every single time.

Busy Busy...

So I started typing this yesterday! I've been that busy! It seems I am in a productive mode lately. The only time I sit down is when I'm feeding the baby or working on a project which leaves me no free hands to type! lol.

This week really has been busy. I decided to start making some stuff for my etsy store. And then I also got some fabric to make the girls some skirts (they're gonna be so cute). So I've spent all of my free time on that stuff. I will post pictures as soon as I get a chance to take some good ones. The flower hair clips I've made turned out really REALLY cute. I'm finding myself wanting to keep them instead of selling them, lol. I will definitely post some pictures when I get a chance.

In the meantime I will also try to make sure I finish up with my blogging challenge posts.... So what if it ends up taking me 2 months to complete a 1 month challenge... at least I'll finish it! It's been fun and interesting doing the Blogging Challenge. Very interesting topics.

In other news. Rebecca is growing like a weed. She is getting so big! Her 4 month check-up is next Friday (I forgot and ended up having to schedule it for then in order for her to see her doctor and not a different one in the practice). I can't wait to find out exactly how big she is!

Charity is loving school. She gets so excited over all the things she's learning. She is just acting more and more grown up every day. She just amazes us with her knowledge and understanding of things.

Danielle is our little fire cracker. She got a little temper and is just so full of energy. The complete opposite of Charity in so many ways. She can be such a little trouble maker and yet such a little Angel. And she is capable of being so darn cute.

We really are blessed with the little family that we have!

Oh, I almost forgot I wanted to share a conversation that I had with Danielle the other day. She is very opinionated and strong willed so handling her when she's upset can be really difficult sometimes. So, we were getting ready to take the van into the shop to get some recalled parts replaced.

Me: "Danielle, What's wrong?"

D: "I don't want to."

Me: "You can ride in the car if you don't want to ride in the van."

D: "No, I don't want to go."

Me: "You have to go Danielle."

D: "O-kay"

She does this really drawn out O when she's giving in. It was just so cute.

Anyway, so there's a quick update on us since I haven't posted in a week or so.